I AM REALLY DIRTY RIGHT NOW. I AM REALLY TIRED RIGHT NOW. AND I AM OVER ALL THE GUYS I HAD CRUSHES ON EVER. MY GOD THAT FEELS FUCKING GOOD. CLEAN SLATE I THINK or i hope. gotta make sure i stay numb. i dont like final exams. they suck. im not nearly finished with this crap. oh fuck.

ANOTHER THING I STOLE FROM JOSH'S LIVE JOURNAL. BOY AM I A THEIF. MWAHAHAHAHA.

[Name:] jen

[Name Backwards]: nej, why???

[Does your name mean anything?]: Jennifer means fair.

[Were you named after anyone?]: your ass.

[Nick Name(s)]: jen...or nick.

[Screen Name(s)]: nicknotsoupcat

[Date Of Birth]: 6/14/84

[Current Location]: ronhert park, CA

[Height]: 5'4.5"

[Shoe Size]: usually 7 womens or 5-6 in boys. or a uk 4.

[Hair colour]: brown. how boring.

[Eye color]: brown. again how boring.

[Innie or Outie?]: in, but why must i answer this?

[Righty, Lefty, or Ambidextrous?]: Righty but im working on ambidextrous.

[Gay, Straight, Bi, or Other]: im straight, but love is love, man. i woudlnt give a fuck if i fell for a girl eventually.

Do You Have...

[Any sisters]: no

[Any brothers]: yeah, Adam

[Any pets]: my fish died.

[A Disease]: my sanity is questionable.

[A Pager]: fuck no

[A Personal phone number]: no

[A leather jacket with studs on it?]: no

[A heroin needle]: hell no

[A Pool or hot tub]: what you think im a yuppie?

[A Car]: not yet.

Describe Your...

[Personality]: like you care...

[Driving]: when im on my bike i tend to crash into trees.

[Car or one you want]: just a car, who gives a fuck what kind you drive?

[Room]: looks like a tornado hit it.

[Shoes]: boots (really worn out doc martins to be exact)

[School]: finals tomorrow...

[Bed]: not made

[Relationship with your parent(s)]: good. very good.

[Believe in yourself]: meh.

[Do you believe in love at first sight?]: not really, that's just your hormones.

[Consider yourself a good listener]: yes[Consider yourself a good friend]: im loyal as fuck.

[Get Along with your parents]: most of the time

[Save your aim conversations]: if its something worth saving which it usually isnt.

[Like to make fun of people]: mostly dan cause he's so emo.

[Like to talk on the phone]: uhhhggg. throw it out the window please.

Do you...

[Like to drive]: wouldnt know, i havent even gotten a permit yet.

[Get motion sickness]: sometimes

[Eat Chicken fingers with a fork]: i dont like those, they are gross

[Dream in color]: all the time.

[Type with your fingers on home row]: yeah i type like i was trained.

[Sleep with a stuffed animal]: yep. 2 of 'em.

What Last/ Is/Are/Was...

[Right next to you]: a spoon that i gave eyes and a mouth and hair too.

[On your mouse pad]: i dont have a mousepad

[Your dream car]: a skateboard.

[Your dream honeymoon spot]: honeymons are a waste of money

[Your bedtime]: NEVER!!!!!

[Under your bed]: my guitar amp, printer and a dresser. dorm beds are so weird.

[Your bad time of the day]: every minute of it

[Your worst fear(s)]:people being mad at me or hating me or seeing anyone suffer without being able to help.

[The time?]: 1:17pm pacific daylight time

[The date?]: May 27

[The hardest thing about growing up]: staying true to yourself while trying to stay friends with your peers. it actually doesnt work which is why everyone hates me.

[Your funniest experience]: too tired to remember

[Your scariest moment]: when i got my first period, i thought i was bleeding to death or something for the first few seconds.

[The silliest thing you've said]: lets go get a baseball bat and hit it with a fence.

[The worst feeling in the world]: knowing you cant help someone when they are in need.

[The best feeling in the world]: that warm feeling you get right after you helped someone and they are happy. FAVORITES

[Number]: 33333333333333333333333!!!!

[Color]: green

[Month]: whenever it rains.

[Song]: too many to name.

[Movie]: evil dead 2 or suburbia oh damnit i dunno fuck it.

[Food]: food is food. just as long as its not red meat or eggplant or mushrooms or asparagus or olives im alright with it.

[Season]: winter

[Sport]: circle pit

[Class]: CLASS? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?? DEFINE WHICH MEANING OF CLASS YOU ARE TAKING ABOUT FOR ME PLEASE.

[Teacher]: ms. davis

[Drink]: milk

[Veggie]: artichoke

[TV Show]: FUCK TV.

[Radio Station]: FUCK RADIO.

[Store]: FUCK CAPITALISM.

[Animal]: cheetah or wolf

[Flower]: no.

[State]: anything not in the USA.

THIS OR THAT

[Me/You]: You.

[Coke/pepsi]: fuck off, it's just soda.

[Day/night]: Night.

[Aol/aim]: AIM.

[Cd/casette]: depends. dont forget vinyl!!!

[Dvd/vhs]: either or.

[Jeans/khakis]: Jeans.

[Car/truck]: truck, yee haw.

[Tall/short]: huh?

[Lunch/dinner]: huh?

[NSYNC/BSB]: burn them both

[Britney/Christina]: burn them both

[Gap/Old Navy]: fuck capitalism

[Lipstick/Lip gloss]: lip BALM. OOH YOU DIDNT THINK OF THAT ONE, EH??? no just chapstick.

[Silver/Gold]: fuck capitalism

[Alcohol/Weed]: caffene pills. or nyquil.

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP

[Do you have a bf/gf?]: i wish, hah.

[If you're single... why are you single?]: because im a big dorky loser that everyone hates.

[If you're not single...give details?]: i said i was single.

[Who was your first love?]: never had a relationship

[What do you miss about them?]: im a loser, remember? havent even had the pleasure of having someone to miss you fuck.

THE PAST

[What is the biggest mistake you've made in your life?]: not saying goodbye to nadine before she died.

[Last thing you said]: typed the word "die". last thing i verbaly said was "meow".

[Who is the last person you saw?]: rachel, she's still in the room she's sleeping.

[Who is the last person you kissed?]: never been kissed.

[Who is the last person you hugged?]: my dad when he dropped me off today.

[Who is the last person you fought with?]: nick danielson, that ass picked on me for no fucking reason just cause he was drunk.

[Who is the last person you were on the phone with?]: nate's answering machine cause i left a message.

[What is the last TV show you saw]: the simpsons, that's the only thing i ever watch if im really bored cause tv is evil.

THE PRESENT

[What are you wearing?]: my docs, red shirt that says "crack" on the back,blaack jeans, a paper wrist thing from my band's gig saturday night on left wrist, multiple ball chains on the same wrist, my dog chains around my neck(woof), socks, tape on my right pinky and ring finger cause my finger is broken, underpants and a pad cause im on my period.

[What are you doing?]: phh filling this out, dummy.

[Who are you talking to?]: nobody

[What song are you listening to?]:the sound of my fingers typing and my roomate softly snoring.

[Where are you?]: dorm room

[Who are you with?]: my roomate who is alseep and the voices in my head.

[How are you feeling?]: didnt you ask me this already?

[Are you in a chatroom?]: hell no i gotta write a paper.

FUTURE

[What day is it tomorrow?]: tuesday..oh wait its tuesday now. wed.

[What are you going to do after this?]: try to sleep.

[Who are you going to talk to?]: heh, myself when im dreaming usually.

[Where are you going to go?]: take a final. uhhg.

[How old will you be when you graduate?]: graduate what? i was 18 when i graduated high school. i dunno when i'll graduate college.

[What do you wanna be?]: myself.

HAVE YOU EVER

[Drank?]: not yet.

[Smoked?]: no, but i get plenty of second hand.

[Had sex?]: nope

[Stolen?]: yeah

[Done anything illegal?]: damn straight

[Wanted to die?]: every day

[Hit someone?]: many times actually.

BLAH MORE QUESTIONS

[What do you most like about your body?]: its useful???

[And least?]: MY UTERUS.

[How many fillings do you have?]: none

[Are there people who often tell you that you're good-looking?]: no im an ugly fuck but some people say im "cute" cause i do "cute" things. fuck them.

[Do you look like any celebrities?]: no i look like yer mom though. AHAHAHAHA.

[Do you wear a watch?]: not anymore.

[How many coats and jackets do you own?]: 2 if you dont count a few sweatshirts.

[Favorite pants/skirt color?]: black

[Most expensive item of clothing?]: shoes

[What kind of shoes do you wear?]: doc martin 12 hole boots.

[Describe your style in one word]: FUCK YOU.

[How old are you mentally (as in are you mature?)]: I HAVE THE MENTALITY OF A FETUS. I'M THAT JUVINILLE. POOP!!!!

[What are your worst qualities]: im annoying and i hate myself.

[What are your best qualities]: do i have any good qualities? i wouldnt know.

[How long does it take you get ready in the mornings]: forever. im usually late to class.

2003-05-23 - 10:42 a.m.

I GOT PRACTICALLY NO SLEEP LAST NIGHT. FUCK. I went to bed at 8pm this morning and woke up at 9. ONE FUCKING HOUR. DAMN.

But now im writing another paper comparing Holden Caulfield to a philosopher. cause he is, you know? he's a cynical teenage philosopher.

I got inspired this morning to write the paper when i was still awake at 5 am and decided to take a walk and watch the sun rise and stuff. I was walking along just all normal like but it was kinda misty still in the field, and i felt like whenever i crossed across the field i was gonna dissapear, like more than usual, cause i feel like that a lot but it was just like in the book, the catcher in the rye. the feeling matched the one in the book exactly. EXACTLY because it was, it was icy and i was running and it was cold with no sun at that moment, and then it hit me, i can write my paper on this.

so yeah, i'm writing another paper, i have until 1:30 or so to finish it and i think i can do it. maybe. if not i'll just email it to my teacher. woo.

well anyways, this morning was magical when i took that walk. I saw a woodpecker out in the quad near the stephenson and salazar buildings. Then i walked over to the duck pond only to see that it was beautifully covered in mist. damn, i gotta take more walks by myself, this morning was great, but the thing is that it was so beautiful i just wish i had someone there to share it with. oh well.

"Anyway, as soon as i got my breath back I ran across Route 204. It was icy as hell and i damn near fel down. I don't even know what I was running for--I guess I just felt like it. After I got across the road, I felt like I was sort of disappearing. It was that kind of a crazy afternoon, terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything, and you felt like you were disappearing every time you crossed the road"

--J.D. Salinger's charachter, Holden Caulfield in the novel The Catcher In The Rye.

2003-05-23 - 2:22 a.m.

oh man do i love to procrastinate on papers. im almost done with the first one, whoopie! i feel sick. bleh. stupid period. and nicky might be coming to visit this summer!!!!! also i have a great idea, im gonna have spud, my homemade punk sock monkey do stuff. im gonna make a website, and take pictures and make a storybook and everthing. i'm psyched. I stole this thing from Josh's live journal. mwahahahahaha.

four tv shows you liked when you were a little kid

1. sesame street

2. that show with the manequin that came alive when you put this magic hat on him, i cant remember the name...laney know it, today's special or something like that...

3. full house (AHAHAHAHHAHAHA, but didn't everyone?)

4. Ninja turtles!!!

[four places to go in your area] heh albany/ronhert park, i'll answer both

1. memorial park/becky court house (for now at least until the peeps move out)

2. fin's house/the empty parking lot for skateboarding

3. 925 Gilman St./class when its in session, hahaha

4. telegraph ave/downtown santa rosa

[four things to do when you're bored]

1. talk to people on the internet

2. play guitar

3. mosh in my room

4. skateboard

[four things that never fail to cheer you up]

1. music

2. skateboarding

3. robin, bert and spud (my favorite stuffed animals)

4. watching evil dead 2

[four things you can't live without]

1. music

2. family

3. friends

4. my guitar (serioulsy, i go through withdrawl when i cant play)

[three things about today...]

1. didnt sleep

2. tried to write my papers we have yet to see if i succeed...

3. went on a walk with nate to visit john cause we hadn't seen him forever.

[seven things you love]

1. my band

2. my friends

3. my family

4. music, this includes listening and playing

5. my guitar

6. watching people

7. getting beat up in circle pits

[seven things you dislike]

1. hate

2. war

3. money

4. labels

5. hypocrites

6. television

7. telephones

[seven things on your desk]

1. waterbottle

2. lots of random papers

3. photos of family and friends

4. sissors

5. plastic army men that are all melted and deformed

6. needle and thread

7. computer monitor and speakers

[seven facts about you]

1. currently, im on a caffene buzz

2. my finger hurts right now

3. i cant hate for more than an hour

4. i have an obsession with reading medical books

5. i can sing and play guitar even though i deny that i'm compitant in anything

6. i procrastinate like a mofo

7. i am incredibly clumsey

[7 artists/bands/people should give a listen to]

1. listen to whatever you want it's your taste.

2. who am i to tell you what to listen to?

3. are you trying to get me to be a facist dictator by telling people what to listen to?

4. fuck no, listen to whatever you want

5. goddamnit i'm bored

6. is this question over yet?

7. the end

[3 sweat things said to you]

1. im on such a caffene buzz right now i cant think of anything anyone said to me at the moment.

2.

3. the end.

2003-05-21 - 11:14 p.m.

You're BALSAC THE JAWS OF DEATH. Which means you
rock cause you're my hero. Keep on
contemplating suicide, it's healthy.

The GWAR QUIZ!!!!
brought to you by Quizilla

GWAR!!!!! AHAHAAHAHAHAHA. i made this quiz so anyone reading this should take it by the way.

2003-05-21 - 10:12 p.m.

it was fucking great today, we had a save our classes/anti war rally at school. stephen got up to speak and went crazy, that john lennon look-alike, josh got up and played a bunch of kickass songs.

Afterwards, laura and nate and me ambushed the rest of the sals peeps with grenade water balloons. After getting mitsy and patrick and dan on his bike, we all filled up more and hid to get stephen and when we did he got REALLY CRAZY!! I gave him a few balloons and the war began, hahahahaha. then nate was an asshole and totally creamed me with a balloon and i just couldnt get him back at all cause of my hand...which he did get wet unfortunatly so the bandage really got fucked up i think...HAH.

Well after that dan, nate and me went down to the pool to piss off the jocks hanging out and we had this whole skit planned out and shit. We were all just in our regular clothes except dan and nate took their shoes off, and so dan went over to the pool and put his finger in to "test out the water".

Then nate SHOVED him in and laughed like a maniac, making some girl say "that wasnt nice to do to your friend," bla bla blah i didnt hear the rest of the comments made cause then i shoved nate in, which was the plan of course. Then dan did something that wasnt in the plan, he got out of the pool and grabbed me, made me empty out my pockets and threw me in the pool.

AHAHAHA, we caused so much of a ruckus, all the bastards chilling at the pool were so confused afterwards and we just left laughing our asses off soaking wet.

Then we ate popsicles i made yesterday fome juice i bought.

Unfortunatly my bad luck ruined the day for awhile, i lost my keys. But then i found them. And then i went to the band concert for the wind ensemble and i kicked ass on the guitar solo but nobody could hear it!!! AAAHH!!! i should've turned the amp up louder!! DAMNIT!!!

oh well.

Heh this was a good day compared to my bad luck streak lately, phh i got electricuted yesterday while pulling out my amp--crazy voltage went up my arm and gave me the weirdest most uncomfortable feeling ive ever had, broke my finger a week ago skateboarding, lost my keys today and my period started today...what's gonna happen tomorrow?? I bet i'll get hit by a car or something, hahaha.

But anyhoo, this is a long entry and this was a fairly good day. I actually had a good day, HAH!!!

 

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